Stand In My Flip Flops

It used to be that person’s word was gold. A handshake sealed the deal. Your reputation was the foundation of your character. Over the last decade, we have witnessed ethics being heaved to curb like the morning trash bag.

There used to be the Washington Post rule. Don’t do anything that would land you above the fold on the front page of the Washington Post. I would add kids and grand kids rule. That being don’t do anything that would embarrass your kids or grand kids. At what point did your conduct seem like a good idea. If at no point, it’s time to hop off the train. As Lou Holtz the famous football coach said, “Do right.” Simple, but spot on.

Cam Newton the Heisman Trophy winner was drafted number one in the NFL draft. The jury is still out on if his Pentecostal preaching father attempted to sell his son’s football playing ability to the highest bidder. Then of course their is the ongoing saga of the Ohio State football team. Several players accepted free tattoos in exchange for memorabilia. Jim Tressel the sweater vest wearing coach apparently knew of the ethic infractions and ignored it. Once the cat was out of the bag, the school had hold to a gun to his head to make an apology. What narcissistic arrogance! He has been suspended for five games and fined a quarter of a million dollars. What  a disgrace for such a wonderful academic school. Notre Dame fired a coach for an exaggerated resume. Alabama fired a coach for being a little too chummy with an exotic dancer. Those infractions pale in comparison, but the current trend is disturbing.

Compare this insidious conduct with players at the service academies. Those players from Army, Navy and Air Force, are poster boys for courage, duty and and most of all honor. They maintain rigorous academic schedules. Many bypassed other scholarships. They have little hope of NFL careers. They are presented an opportunity to serve in the military for five years.

Perhaps there is hope.

Last week, I stopped for gas at an exit off I-75. The refuel stop was one of those large car/truck/store/diner rest stops. Every pump on the car side was occupied except for one. I raced around, only to finish second.

I decided to exercise patience. No luck. The occupants slid out of the car as if they had just taken a 30 year mortgage on the real estate they occupied. The couple mosied to the store instead of the pump. Recognizing the futility of my position, I analyzed the situation and pulled around to another area, which was occupied by a pickup and a hauler. This contraption occupied two pumps. After waiting a couple of minutes, two fellows sauntered out of the store to their waiting truck. They unwrapped candy bars and tucked groceries away before starting the process of pumping gas. I was in no hurry myself, but I was now becoming annoyed at the lack of consideration these morons displayed.

As the Irish say, if it wasn’t for bad luck, I would have any luck at all. No matter what line I queue in, it is usually the slowest.

Finally, a spot opened and I jumped in like lottery winner. I completed my gas purchase and was exiting before the rude and inconsiderate drivers of the other vehicles had completed their fill-ups. Have I done the same? Yes when the pumps were empty and I would not inconvenience other drivers. I have also filled up and repositioned my car so as not to deny another customer the opportunity to purchase gas.

In August 2010, a Rasmussen poll found that 69% of Americans believe their fellow Americans are more rude and less civilized. In an April 2010 poll by Weber Shandwick reported that 94% of the those polled considered the lack of civility to be a problem. Three quarters of the polled believe that civility has deteriorated in the last few years.

It is bad enough that the prices of gas has risen to just south of four bucks, but it makes it worse when I am wasting precious fuel waiting for rude people to release the lease they hold on a gas pump. Just as in the gas pumpers who couldn’t care less about others, we should all stand in each others Flip Flops and show civility towards others. The Golden Rule. Treat others as you would like to be treated.

I stopped at furniture store to see their pricing. It was a spur of the moment stop on my way to a meeting. I owned previous furniture from this company and was not satisfied with the durability of the foam cushions. After 6 years we had to have this high quality and expensive reclining furniture re-stuffed.

The pleasant salesperson desended upon me quickly. I told her I was not satisfied with the durability of the foam in my reclining living room set that cost four thousand dollars.

The sales person told me that due to the humidity, five years is all you can expect. Humidity? This indoor furniture is in a climate controlled environment. I told her, when I lived in New Orleans, we replaced our furniture because it was out of date, while the furniture was almost as comfortable as the day we bought it eleven years earlier. Humidity?

Just be honest. Come on! I asked about the density of the foam and she had no clue. No where can I find humidity breaking down foam on inside furniture. Fortunately for her, I was in a hurry and found their prices were just as expensive for over rated cheap furniture.

I was at another furniture company and asked about the foam density. That sales person was familiar with density, but sounded like a parrot. She kept chirping about buying the overpriced and underused warranty at  every question concerning durability. Those warranties have high commissions attached.

Salesperson be honest. Many customers know when you are feeding a line on nonsense. Develop trust by being truthful. Truth will carry the day and develop rapport.

A frantic job applicant called to say he would be late for his scheduled job interview. He had arrived looking for parking and found a spot, but it was a metered lot. He had no cash, so he had to dash off to find an ATM. He somehow found his way on the other side of town and the late side of traffic. He should have called and saved face by saying he was no longer interested in the job, because with that first impression, their is no way he would have been successful. Take notes, this works for the first date or huge sales meeting as well.

If you are going for a job interview, conduct a dry run. Burglars and terrorists do it, why not applicants. Before you leave the house, plot the drive on Google Maps and use the street view as well. With Google Maps, you can take in all the terrain, parking lots or garages and more importantly, visualize the job interview destination. Print the Google Maps and place them in the car. Drive the route, park, and walk into the lobby of the building. You can practice alternate routes. Keep in mind what time is your interview and traffic implications such as construction, sporting events, or school zones.

Twas the night before the job interview. Your car is snugly parked with plenty of gas to make the round-trip and the battery is charged. The address is preset in your GPS. You will set two alarms, one must be battery operated and set far enough away that you must exit the warm confines of your luxurious bedding. Set out your clothes the night before.

Eat breakfast and plan to leave at least 45 minutes early. This does not include scraping the windshield time. This is buckled in and backing out time. This will not compensate for a flat tire, but it will cover you for traffic delays. This is all about simplicity of life and reducing stress.

Watch the Starbucks. No caffeine on the drive. You don’t want to have the awful spill or have coffee breath. Too much and you could be all amped up. Crank up the tunes. If you arrive super early, great break out a book or magazine and read. Stephen King recommends never being without a book. Smile, check the teeth, pop a mint and take a deep breath. Oh and don’t forget cash.

A young good-looking young man wearing the uniform of a pilot for a major airline walked with confidence into a bank. He strode up to the bank teller with a smile. He reached into his dark blue uniform jacket and extracted a personal check. If requested, he also had his airline identification. The young man presented a personal check drawn on another bank and asked to cash the check. The teller smiled and conversed with the affable and dashing young man. She cashed the check for the non-customer without a second glance.

The young man was not a copilot for Pan Am Airlines. He was a sixteen-year-old conman named Frank Abagnale, Jr. Frank was responsible for passing 2.5 million dollars in worthless checks over a five-year period of time. He also flew all over the world at the expense of Pan American. In addition, he also assumed the role of a college professor, a physician, an attorney and a jail inspector. The book and movie, Catch Me if You Can, describes his exploits.

Had he walked into the bank in street clothes, the bank would have thrown him out on the sidewalk. The costume and his demeanor made a positive first impression and established instant credibility. He was also a studious young man who immersed himself into the assumed occupation to learn the lingo and the appropriate back-story.

As I previously explained, the brain processes information in the bang of two hands clapping together. There are certain activities that you engage in that will allow for do-over’s. If you fail a test, you can offset your grade on the next test. If your evaluation is poor, you can make alterations and work harder to achieve a better review. In first impressions, you get one. There are no second or third impressions. You may have an opportunity to counter a first bad impression, but it might be easier to climb the north face of Mt Kilimanjaro.

People will banter about, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” This is the difference between theory and reality. In theory that sounds nice and empathetic. Give them a second chance. The reality is that psychologically, that first impression has been anchored into your brain. We have all met people that we had a negative first impression and then over time we changed our opinion. Many times, we do not alter our initial opinion. Make that first impression count as you exude confidence and smile.

Every year, people begin the journey of the New Year by resolving to making changes in their lives. Going to the health club in January is like standing in line at Disney. Diet supplements fly off the charts and people cut back on expenses.

Within 3 months most of these New Years resolutions are a distant memory. Advocates will come up with all kinds of goal setting techniques to keep people focused and on target. In theory all these lists sound good, but in reality most people are who they are. The exceptions make permanent changes.

For the short term, goal listing is a great idea. You better make the habbit of pulling out that list once a week to remind you. Taping them on the mirror is fine, but after a week, it becomes no different than the face staring at the mirror. Putting the list on the refrigerator will fade into oblivion with grocery list and family collage of photos.

What choice do you have? Accept your deficiencies? You should always seek improvement, but realize it takes more than writing a list or verbalizing your goals on January 1st. Develop a plan and stick to it. It takes hard work and developing new habits. New habits take hold after 21 days. That is the target. Change for 21 days and you on your way to success. Go for it!

Five Ohio State Buckeye football players were suspended for five games beginning next year. They sold items they believed were personal items to a tattoo parlor in exchange for cash and discounted tats. They claim they were putting food on the table of their families.

One mother had the audacity to claim the NCAA is at fault because her son has to have a car, put gas in said car and insure said car. I hate to burst her bubble, but many college students suffer without said car. They use public transportation which is usually robust around a large university.

Ohio State University one of the most prestigious public universities only provides tuition, books, room and board. The chances are, most of these players would never have had the grades or SAT scores to gain acceptance in an open academic competition. They possess a special skill that enables them to obtain an almost free education and the University is able to provide entertainment, enhance school pride and alumni participation along with millions of dollars in revenue. The exceptional athletes will have huge paydays in the NFL, but most will fall back on their education. Many will never graduate.

At this time of the year, I would have sympathy for the athletes families, but not when I see Terrelle Pryor sporting hundreds of dollars worth of body art and a diamond ear stud. Perhaps it is a cubic zirconia. Many students without the athletic skill set walk away with a degree and thousands of dollars in loans that will take years to pay back. How many of these students who attended school to better their lot in life came from lower socioeconomic back grounds?

The problem with this whole situation is that I have yet to hear the athletic department at OSU rebuke the athletes. All I have heard is they plan to appeal the punishment, spin, and excuses. They were kids, they weren’t educated on the rules, blah blah. This is the problem when conduct is excused and we place people on pedestals. They have a sense of entitlement that is only a symptom of their selfish narcissism.

Recently, the most sought after pitcher in the free agent market, Cliff Lee signed a hefty paycheck with the Philadelphia Phillies. The surprising part of his 120 million dollar contract was that he turned down the Yankees who were willing to pay 150 million. Why did he sign for 30 million less?

He placed his family ahead of the dollar! It is refreshing. According to some reporting, aapparently when he was pitching against the Yankees, the local N.Y. fans were not enamored with the wives  for the Texas Rangers and hurled some spit in their direction. Mrs. Lee took offense to the behavior and convinced Mr. Lee to sign with Philly. Karma?

What right do you have to hurl body fluids at opposing teams families? Regardless of the price tag for the ticket, you don’t have that right. Sure you can criticize, but let’s keep it civil. Soldiers are dying in battlefields across the world and unemployment is just below 10%. It’s a game. Let’s keep it real. You would think with the price of tickets, you would filter out some of the riff raff. Maybe they were given the tickets. Will the spitting by some fans cost the Yankees a World Series again. Pitching was the difference last year. These fans had no idea what impact their conduct would have. As Lou Holtz says, “Do right.”

On another note, Carl Crawford the outstanding outfielder for the Rays, signed with the Boston Red Sox for 124 million. By all accounts he is a classy guy. It was reported that every time he comes to the plate, he will receive $33,000 per at bat. Regardless of the fact that at best, he will get on-base only 30% of the time. Meanwhile school teachers all over the country are paid a salary of $33,000 for the entire year. They don’t have the luxury of getting it wrong 2/3 of the time.